Behind the Curtin

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Behind the Curtin

Post by Sparkle on Fri 05 Dec 2008, 9:50 am

Stabbed to death.
The wounds grow deeper.
Cuts all over my body.
The wind stings.

Hurt on the inside.
Numb on the outside.
Can't see the sun.
I'm permanently damaged.

Never enough to myself.
Never enough to you.

Poison injection.
Pulse through my veins.
Lethal shot to the heart.
Stops the beating quickly.

Stay strong.
No, I don't feel the pain.
Stop lying to yourself.
You know you're hurt.

Never enough to myself.
Never enough to you.

Feel my lungs close up.
I don't need oxygen.
Pressure in my chest.
Why won't it just crush me?

Heart speeds up.
Last few beats.
I do feel it, I admmit.
And it's because of you.

Never enough to myself.
Never enough to you.

You take that rope.
Tie me down.
Cut my body slowly.
I feel your pain.

Take the knife.
Stab. You puncture my heart.
No, I'm not dead yet.
Stab. All the blood spills out.

Never enough to myself.
Never enough to you.

I still loved you once I healed.
You said you loved me too.
But your most precious memories.
Were never of me.

Well, they were once of me.
Now they're of her.
But she stabs you.
Yet you still love her.

Never enough to myself.
Never enough to you.

I guess we endure the same pain.
But, I'm not the murderer here.
Silent killers.
She kills you, you kill me.

Can't accuse you of your crime.
I'm killed behind the scene. No wittnesses.
Behind the curtain of the stage.
The world only sees when the curtain opens.

Never enough to myself.
Never enough to you.

Gave you my heart and soul.
You took them, but I was only left empty.
You gave her your everything.
While I poured my soul out to you.

It's okay. I guess I can take it.
I know she's better...
But part of me still wonders.
Why I'm never enough.

Never enough to you.
Never enough to myself.

Self esteem gone down the drain.
No fixing that.
I'm always second best.
Only because I care.

Is it too much to ask for?
I want to be loved back.
FOR ONCE. To feel...
Good enough, in my eyes.

Never enough for you.
Never enough to myself.

Dizzy. Head spins.
Head pounding.
Heart throbbing.
Chest breaking in.

Sight, turning blind.
Mind breaking down.
Feelings all lost.
Empty and nothing.

Never enough for you.
Never enough to myself.

"Remember her gentle kiss."
Fine, don't remember mine.
The girl that wasn't hard to get, just loved you.
Was not a hard enough catch.

I can try, to repair.
I can try, to save you.
I can try, to be good enough.
I can try, to quit while I'm still ahead.

Never enough for you.
Never enough to myself.

Bring the knife closer to my kneck.
You're not yourself.
No one cares. Because she doesn't care.
And I'm worth nothing.

I'm only behind the curtains.
Only behind the scenes.
When the curtain opens.
They see a smiling girl and a hurt boy.

Never enough for you.
Never enough for myself.

Curtain closes. Back to real life.
Roles. Girl is stabbed and dead.
And you hold the knife in your hands.
What have you done?

Never enough for you.
Never enough for myself.

You're hurting. You need someone.
You take her dead body.
Comfort yourself now.
Is she worth anything without her heart?

Of course not.
Everyone only liked her because she cared.
Because she would take the stabs and cuts.
Because she'd hurt for your happines.

Neve enough for you.
Never enough for myself.

I guess I'll always be the backup.
I'll always be second best to her.
Or anyone else for that matter.
Never be anyone's first.

Give my heart.
Give my soul.
Give everything.
And these scars will never heal.

But that was never enough for you.
And, now, I'll never be enough for myself.
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Sparkle
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Number of posts : 25
Age : 23
Location : In your heart and on your mind. I will be waiting in the city of destiny.

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